Ranked: Top 5 Lists of Stuff That Don’t Matter

Hosted ByTuong La

The fine folks at PodCavern gather a motley crew of self-proclaimed experts (Tuong La and special guests) to weigh in, rank, and order top 5 lists of anything and everything.


All Episodes

118 – Top 5 Swear Words

Surprise mother fu***kas!

There’s nothing like a good swear word (or ten) to help you articulate or vent your frustration. As children, we were taught that using profanity was a big no no but maybe if we were able to swear back then we’d be able to let out our anger in a more healthy way (think about it!). That said, when we think of swear words we immediately go to the “taboo” words that would shock and appall your grandparents but not all swear words need to have same shock value to be a good one. So this week join Tuong and Potty Mouths Axandre Lemours, Victoria Luloff, Jess Maybear as they shout blasphemy at each other while ranking Top 5 Swear Words!

117 – Top 5 Candy

“Weeeee want Candy!”
As kids, candy was the pinnacle of food (who cares about steak dinners or gourmet seafood when you can have a handful of Sour Patch Kids). Somewhere along the way, the constant nagging of teachers, parents, and health experts convinced us that candy was “bad for us” and we should only eat it “occasionally and in moderation”. Well no more! This week join Tuong and Pull the Plug’s Justin Godelie, Shannon Godelie, and Dan Foerster as they embody the phrase “kids in a candy store” and rank Top 5 Candy!

116 – Top 5 Summer Olympic Games

Let the games begin! Okay let’s be real. The Olympics most probably shouldn’t be happening this year due to the ongoing pandemic let alone just the sheer negative environmental...

115 – Top 5 The Legend of Zelda Songs

“HEY! Listen!”
Earlier this year we paid tribute to everyone’s favourite video game plumber by celebrating Top 5 Super Mario Songs . But Mario isn’t the only one with a big anniversary to celebrate this year. That’s right! This time, we are giving love to another one of gaming’s most popular franchises – The Legend of Zelda for their 35th anniversary! So this week join Tuong and the Tri-Force trio that is Justin Godelie, Spencer Moreland, and Kristine Shadid as they grab their ocarinas and spin attack their way to making a Top 5 Legend of Zelda Songs list!

114 – Top 5 Canadian Foods

What even is “Canadian” food anyway?
There are many mixed emotions releasing this episode today. On one hand, we originally recorded this to “celebrate” Canada as we have in the past. On the other hand, with recent news and the further evidence of how Canada has mistreated our Indigenous Communities it’s difficult to feel very patriotic. With that said, we have included resources in our show notes to resources and charities so you can help educate yourself as well as give back to some incredible Indigenous causes.

Ultimately, we decided to release today’s episode anyways. Today’s episode centres more around food than Canada and our guests today would be the first to tell you that they don’t celebrate Canada day. So join Tuong and The Upford Network/Natural Toonie’s  Tom Zalatnai, Alexander Smith, and David Hall as they try to figure out what is “Canadian Food” and make a Top 5 list from it!

113 – Top 5 Fictional Dads

Who’s your daddy? (Us. It’s us.)
We’ve done Fictional Moms so it’s only fair to pass some love to daddys right? So join Tuong La Fur-Fathers Axandre Lemours, Catherine Ballachey, and Alli Harris as they work out their collective issues and rank Top 5 Fictional Dads.

112 – Top 5 Conspiracy Theories

Question everything (even this podcast).

Humans have this undying and relentless need to uncover the truth to things. However, sometimes an answer to a question is not satisfying enough and we are left in this state of “well that’s too simple” or “I don’t buy it”. That’s why we gravitate towards conspiracy theories, as wild as some may be. They contain just enough nuggets of truth in there to make things plausible and their explanation can throw everything back into question on what we know. So join Tuong La and co-conspirators Patricia Eddu, Stefanie McBurns, and Stenley Philippe as they question everything (including themselves) while ranking Top 5 Conspiracy Theories!

111 – Top 5 TV Game Shows

Come on down!
TV Game shows have been around for a very long time. And while the history of this format has been around forever, the appeal of them has always been the same – that everyday people could win a lot of money by being tested for their mental or physical abilities (or more times than not just dumb luck). So this week join Tuong La and What We Do in the Basement’s Jesse Bergen, Natashia Durand, and Thomas Proles as they they land on the Daily Double and give the final answer of “what is Top 5 TV Game Shows?”.

110 – Top 5 Steves

Oh you thought we were done ranking first names? We have barely begun…
We’ve done Ryans, we’ve done Chrises, it was only a matter of time until we reached a point to ranking the glorious name that is…Steve! This week join Tuong La and Stupendous Steve Experts Desiree Connors Warmington, Geoff McBride, and Leslie Cserepy as we spend a (very) long time arguing and ranking Top 5 Steves!