58 – Top 5 Super Powers

April 24, 2019

Ranking Super Powers is our Endgame.

Today we are celebrating 11 years of the MCU and superhero pop culture by giving our take on an aged old question: “What are the best super powers?”. Face it, even the most jaded comic book sneerer wishes they can get up and fly out of bed,  transform into a fire breathing lizard, or shoot lasers out of their eyes! This week join Tuong La and New Mutants Justin Godelie, Dan Foerster, and Angus MacDonald as they put on the Infinity Gauntlet and materialize their take on the Top 5 best super powers!

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Ground Rules

  • You can’t choose a character and get all their powers
  • It’s the result not the the means that define the power (ie. Green lantern’s ring is the means and the hard light constructs are the result)
  • Gadgets and tech do not count (ie Batman’s utility belt)
  • Can’t be a made up super power
  • Nominating under the impression that our bodies can handle the super power
  • The Force does not count or entities don’t count (ie phoenix force, symbiote)
  • No universe shattering powers count

*Spoilers* Below is our Top 5 list from this episode as well as our own personal unordered  lists. More detailed descriptions of the caveats with each power are discussed in the episode.

Group Top 5

5. Shape Shifting

4. Healing Factor

3. Time Freeze

2. Elemental Bending

1. Teleportation

Tuong’s List

  • Elemental Bending
  • Super Flight
  • Hard Light Constructs
  • Magneto Powers
  • Energy Blasts
  • Spidersense
  • Super speed
  • Super learning
  • Technomancy
  • Super Luck
  • Animal Control
  • Alchemy Control (ie Full Metal Alchemist)
  • Eating fruit and being able to fuck up anything in your path for about 10 seconds (Pac-Man)
  • “Ring King Belt Adjustment”
    • “The most hilarious super power ever imagined is the Ring King manager’s power to heal your boxer’s battered body with an enthusiastic “belt adjustment.” Whenever a round is over and your fighter returns to his corner, the trainer immediately drops to his knees and goes to work on your fighter’s “belt.” Somewhere in Japan there’s an old programmer laughing their head off at the fact so many American kids had to watch this over and over”

Justin’s List

  • Teleportation
  • Power Absorption
  • Matter Duplication
  • Invisibility
  • Super Speed
  • Time Travel
  • Telepathy
  • Super Decision Making
  • Speaking with the Dead
  • Body Manipulation

Angus’s List

  • Healing Factor
  • Ability to recall events in third person ie Sherlock’s Mind Palace
  • Freezing Time
  • Hammer Space (reaching behind your back and pulling out anything)
  • Ability to eat anything
  • Ability to say the exact right thing to end a conversation
  • Plot Armour (the thing every protagnist has that ensures them that they’ll be okay in the end/actually learning from their mistakes)
  • Sweaty Explosion Hands (My Hero Academia)

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